Baywatch

[Joke of the day]

What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson's breasts?
Silicon Valley.

[_AnkeF_]

The miracle of toilet paper


The Miracle of Toilet Paper

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion:
"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts.
"How long will this take?" I ask.
"They will grow larger over a period of years," he replies.
I stop. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"

Without missing a beat he says: "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again.
Stupid, stupid man.

[_AnkeF_]

Weeweechu


One beautiful December evening Huan Cho and his girlfriend
Jung Lee were sitting by the side of the ocean. It was a
romantic full moon, when Huan Cho said "Hey baby, let's
play Weeweechu."

"Oh no, not now, lets look at the moon" said Jung Lee.

"Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I play Weeweechu. I love
you and it's the perfect time," Huan Cho Begged.

"But I rather just hold your hand and watch the moon."

"Please Jung Lee, just once play Weeweechu with me."

Jung Lee looked at Huan Chi and said, "OK, we'll play
Weeweechu."

Huan Cho grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....
"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas,
Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."

AND SO DO I!

[the joke of the day]

RE: Weeweechu


thank you,
I think the race between technoscientific forces that are destroying our living environment and those that can be harnessed to save it, can`t be won.
Humanity needs to take action immediately - but where is it?
But whichever way things turn out, we can't say we weren't warned.

[Joke of the day]

Four Men and Their Dogs


Four men, an Engineer, an Accountant, a Chemist and a Government Worker were bragging about how smart their dogs were.
To show off, the Engineer called to his dog and said, "T-Square, do your stuff."

T- square trotted over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart. But the Accountant said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Slide Rule, do your stuff."

Slide Rule went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good. But the Chemist said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Measure, do your stuff."

Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop. Everyone agreed that was good. Then the three men turned to the Government Worker and said, "What can your dog do?"

The Government Worker called to his dog and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff."
Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, dumped on the paper, molested the other three dogs, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Worker's Compensation and went home on sick leave.